‘A sad end to a great footballing man’
Why did he do it?
That is the question that remains in the mind of family, friends, colleagues and supporters alike, and is one that is likely to remain unanswered with regards to the death of Gary Speed. His passing is nothing short of a tragedy and has rocked the game to the very core.
I have to say I was taken aback by the news and like the majority failed to comprehend how a man, who from the outset seemingly had everything at his feet and as national team manager was at the pinnacle of his sport, found himself in such a dark place that he had little option but to end it all there and then. I am sure I wasn’t the only one that found it even more chilling that he seemed so full of energy and spirit on Football Focus a few hours previous. This wasn’t seemingly a man who visibly had demons eating him up inside, but I guess how would anyone of known.
Stan Collymore highlighted on twitter last Friday his battle against depression and how it hits you like a train at times and you are left not knowing which way to turn to. Let’s be honest most people fail to recognise the severity of depression or insecurities and to many it is derided as an illness, mainly down to our ignorance towards the disease. Full credit to Collymore for making people aware its consequences and calling on those sufferers to be open about it, and talk to doctors and friends. I guess herein lies the tragedy with Speed that he didn’t have the ability to tell those loved ones of his issues and I’m sure all his friends will be equally upset that he didn’t confide. Whether Speed did in fact suffer from depression remains to be seen; but the fact he couldn’t open up about the issues that led to his untimely death highlights a man who would rather suffer in silence than pass on his problems to anyone else. So many people will be left ruing the fact he didn’t and they will have that feeling inside for the rest of their lives.
I know it is somewhat clichéd that when tragedy strikes you evaluate and take stock of your own situation, but it certainly put life into perspective. It got me thinking of all the things that anger me in football like your players who are happy to go on strike; the parasite agents who milk their clients dry, or the workings of FIFA and I find my blood boiling even more. Gary Speed was the model professional, a fabulous ambassador for the Sport who gave everything to the game we all love – basically ten times the man of any of the above – and yet a real football man is taken from us, while the self-centred sods happily go about their business. It doesn’t seem fair and it doesn’t seem right, but it just further highlights the enormity of this tragedy.
The inquest to Speed’s death opens today and I hope that his family and friends get some answers to their questions over their tragic loss. I hope the powers that be look into the psychological side of football and ensure clubs educate their footballers of a variety of issues, including the perils of depression as Collymore alluded to. Lastly I hope that Gary Speed finally finds himself at peace with himself after leaving a world, in which judging by the heartfelt tributes he was clearly adored.
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RIP Gary.